Whats wrong here?
After my summer of hell, a horrible break up, I ran back to school, for the second time. I think that returning to college is my way to excape from the world. In college, I can be who I am, do whatever I want to do, with who ever I want, if I get tired of being around somebody, i can just leave. But it doesnt always work like that in the real world, just in college. I went home for thanksgiving break and I was seriously annoyed with everybody, high school friends and family. I know that those are the people who matter most and who will be there for you no matter what, but I couldnt get over how much they annoyed me. Im 20 years old and I havent lived at home for almost 3 years, and when I go back its like being in a completely different world than what I am used to. Im not used to sibblings fighting all the time over stupid little things like the remote to the tv or somebody drinking somebody elses soda. It drives me crazy. I think I have become crazy. I live a really social life in college. I go out all the time, hang out with a large group of people who are constantly around, I have fun and still maintain excellent grades. Until recently, it was fun. But now I just want to be alone, I do not want to talk to anybody or see anybody and i certainly do not want to get all dressed up and go out like I used to. I go out of my way to avoid people, thats kinda wierd. What could it be? Maybe its the weather??? Its always cloudly and cold, and I hate it. I even cut my hair for no reason, now i have become really self conscious. I just feel so lonely and as much as my stupid ex-boyfriend ruined my life, right now I just want to run back to him and have him hold me in his arms and just be loved and liked. Gosh that sounds so stupid lol. He might of loved me, but he really didnt like me. Is is normal to all of a sudden get tired of everybody and everything that you thought you loved? To stop hanging out and begin avoiding the people I pretty much live with here on c |
ampus? Maybe all I need is a break...? I cant go home.
It's totally normal to feel that way. When you go away from the high school crowd, the persona you developed when you were around them disappears, and when you come back, some times you wonder why you were friends with many of them to begin with. I guess that can be said with family too. I heard a quote the other day that I really liked. It went something like "Friends are God's way of apologizing for our families" |
